Back again..

So, I've had a lot going on in my life and have been away from blogging for some time.  And the other day, I got to thinking that I really need a blog to write in again...  I need somewhere to bitch and complain where it isn't a big deal.  I've tried to do it on my Facebook, and even MySpace back in the day.  But so far, I get about as much response there as I expected.  Not that I get a ton of response on here, but I figure at least here, we're all in the same boat.  So whether people respond or not, I know others are dealing with similar issues.  Anyways, I was looking at other sites and decided that here was where I wanted to come back to and LOW AND BEHOLD, my blog is still here!  I thought that they were deleted after a couple of months.  However, it had been nearly 2 YEARS since I had been here!

What happened you ask?  Why did I walk away for so long?  Ah, well, something wonderful happened.  :D  I got pregnant!  Shortly after my last post, tons of things went on and I just never got back to posting.  My husband and I had decided to start trying, but I didn't think it would happen so fast!  I guess from where I had lost weight, was maintaining, and taking good care of myself, I was in great health to get preggo!  When I got preggo, I was too sick in the beginning to blog and then after that, too busy!  I got swine flu when I first found out.  Anyways, I stayed away then, and have stayed away since just because I figured that after being gone for so long this had been deleted.  And not to mention that after the little guy got here, I was too busy and too tired to write.  He is now almost 8mos., and I still don't have a lot of time, but I am trying to put my health back closer to the top of my list.

So, here's the deal.  I've been doing low carb eating and working out for the last 10 weeks.  And so far, I've only lost about 8lbs.  I haven't been 'strict' but I have been pretty dedicated.  However, I have a LOT to lose at this point after having my baby.  I am no where near my high of 226.5 from years back, but I am about 208.5 on my good days.  But I must confess that I weighed in this AM at 213.  I had Mexican last night and I guess I'm all bloaty...  But with my little guy being so grumpy as of late either from ear ache or teething, I was in a bad place and chose to eat junk because I wanted it.  I don't consider myself a 'food addict', but I do tend to self comfort with food.  Honestly, I think most people do.  It's always been the way we've celebrated or relaxed.  But I'm honest with it, so I don't feel like it's an 'addiction'.

After having my baby, I first dropped down to 199 and had hoped to keep losing, but many things have come up like my Dad sick, my Granny had a fall, my BIL sick.... my other BIL sick... it's just been one thing after another.  And I tend to not handle things like that well.  I do fine in the moment, but then I fall apart after.  I'm not sure why that is.  Anyways, I went up during that time, but now it is time to get back to business and lose the weight.  I am now 31yrs. old and I can't sit around and dawdle.  I am not getting younger and my health isn't going to get better.  Not to mention the lack of energy!  It's time to get down to business!

SO, after so much time not only since writing but also since dieting, I have made some decisions.  Low carb works for me for maintenance, but not for loss.  It's too slow and I am getting too frustrated.  Not only with my food, but with myself.  The only option then is to go back to my shakes.  I made the decision yesterday to go back to 'liquid dieting', journaling, tracking my food, and doing all the other things I did the first time I lost so much (like lots of water and my vitamins).  I am giving myself 3 months.  I know that doesn't sound like much, but if I stick with it, I know I can drop quite a bit in that amount of time.  And right now, that is what I need.  I'm already in dieting mode from doing the LC for the last 2.5 months and I have been training for a 5k.  So, the switch back to the shakes shouldn't be too terribly hard.  I know I might have a rough few days, but then after that, I just have to stick it.

Although today has been good.  I have had two shakes and I have chicken laid out for a nice low carb or 'lean and green' dinner.  I plan on having a snack here in a bit -- probably some cheese and berries.  YUM.  Not sure what else will be on the menu for later, but I'm feeling good so far.  Like I said, I think my body is already in mode.  But tomorrow could be a different story.  I've even been able to get several things done today.  And since I have been so frustrated with just low carbing, the shakes feel like a welcome relief.  I just hope that I make good progress.

I guess this is all for now -- it has taken me pretty much all day just to type this!  I also need to update my other stuff.  So, onward and..... DOWNWARD!