Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Broken Scale

I think my scale is broken.  I got on to weigh this AM and it gave me FOUR different numbers.  FOUR.  I'm not sure why... I think maybe it's going dead.  :(  I only weighed that many times because the first time I got on it said 179... then it rolled to 179.5.  I was like, huh?  Ok, I'll take it and then I was like, one more time.  Then it said 180.  Hubby was like, that's weird.  I said yeah and reset it then got on again and 181.5.  ARE YOU FREAKIN' KIDDING ME?  I don't know what the issue was but I was like, I'll take the 179.5 or 180 and call it a day.  LOL  I'll try again tomorrow.  Just seems like it is being a weirdo today.  And I don't get that.  It's annoying!  I hope it isn't dying.  I hate buying a new scale.

On another note, yesterday was a very productive day despite waking up with a headache.  I finally took a boat load of meds and got it to lessen and I busted out a ton of painting.  I got ALL of the upper cabinets repaired and primed.  AND the fireplace downstairs!  All of them look great!  I need to do a light sanding and then put on two coats of real paint.  But already, the clean white looks so great.  I'm rethinking my soft grey/taupe... maybe just do white or a slight off white.  The others would be good for me, but maybe for resale purposes a simple white would be better.  But already with just one cabinet up, I can see how it is going to be a huge change.  I am so pleased with it!  I think with the repairs and paint, new backsplash and decluttering, it's just going to be amazing.  And the fireplace looks SOOOOO GOOOOD!  It's going to need sanding and final paint, too. But with just primer it looks fantastic.  All it needs after that is the tile and grout.  :D  Guess we will see how much we get done over the next few weeks. 

Did I mention our painter called and said he was VERY behind and it would be a while before he got to us?  Yeah.  He called yesterday to tell us that.  So, we have decided to postpone putting the house on the market.  *sigh*  It's for the best.  We need to knock out some more projects before we do it and the extra couple of weeks might help out.  It will depend on weather, how we feel, etc.  We had hoped to have it on by mid-July, but now that isn't going to happen.  Not sure what our new goal should be.  Maybe August 8th?  Hopefully the outside will be painted by then, I can get some yard stuff finished, and knock out a few of the inside projects.  And even if every thing isn't done, if the majority is, that would hopefully be enough to go ahead and list.  Guess we will see.

Well, hubby is up and running around.  I need to get going and do a few things and make my kiddo some cupcakes.  Birthday time!  :D  The time goes by so so so fast....

Monday, July 21, 2014


Oh, this weekend was sweetness!  You see, my fave SIL got married.  :D  Hubby and kiddos were in the wedding, but I wasn't.  Mostly due to my own whining.  LOL  She knew I was burned out on doing weddings.  Which is my own fault.  I love them, I do.  But I HATE the work and the money.  I've been in so many at this point, that it was time to retire.  So, I said to everyone that I was done with them.  So you see, my very own fault!  LOL  But it's ok -- I got to just watch and mostly enjoy.  I did get annoyed that the woman coordinating wasn't thinking to do simple things like have everyone potty before they went down the isle, but it was fine.  I reminded them, I fed the kiddos before the 'big time' and every thing went pretty smooth other than the sound system messed up.  Even though it had worked fine during rehearsal.  But meh, who cares?  She was beautiful, he was handsome, they were all glowy and they are officially married!  I told the kiddos they can 'officially' call him Uncle now.  LOL  They already had.

Anyways, it was a good weekend with no family drama that I am aware of.  I know there were a few questions and comments, but they were within certain groups and didn't cross any lines or anything so it was good.  I like weekends like this!  I did make one comment that I hope didn't come across wrong... I was trying to say one thing but I think I may have phrased it wrong.  I tried to explain, but I think that may have made it worse, ya know?  I feel like I get what I'm trying to say across darn well most of the time, but then other times I royally fuck it up.  Sorry for the language, but it's the truth and no other word could accurately describe it.  HA!

On the house front, there hasn't been any change since we weren't home to do anything.  But today was a mixed day of errands and then yard work.  So, no project progress unless you count more yard clean up (random junk thrown away), and then progress on the fire and trash pits.  I'm happy about that!  I feel like it's the eyesore of the yard, and once we get that done, it will be a huge improvement.  Hubby worked on a little project, too, along with yard work.  It was the area around the HVAC unit and the carport.  We've been at a loss as to what to do there, and this seems like the beginning of a good solution.  I guess we will see.

Now, on to food and diet!  Obviously being out of town I couldn't track my food as well as I would like, but I realized when I went to put on a pair of my capri pants that they felt a bit snug even though I haven't been going crazy.  And it got me to thinking that it had been a while since I had checked my reports and all that.  I did get in ONE workout last week, but I need to get more, so that is an area for improvement.  Another is that I have been going overboard on the ol' carbs.  My macro's are set to 160g, but from checking out my 'reports', I see I've been WELL over 200 every single day.  Not good.  That isn't moderation!  That's overkill!  No, I'm not really a carb watcher, but I have been crankier lately, hungry, and bloaty.  I use to watch carbs, as many of you know, to control my hypoglycemia and PCOS.  But after losing some weight, it hadn't really been an issue.  But that many carbs just aren't a good balance and it isn't helping me with any of my previous issues, I'm sure.  So, I decided that I'm going to watch them more closely.  I'm not going to get crazy or go all low carb.  I don't feel that is what I need anymore.  But I am going to cut back on them.  I've gotten into the lazy habit of letting them be my 'filler'.  Oh, I need a snack?  How about a tortilla.  Oh, I have 100 cals left?  How about some chips.  Oh, that soup needs something... how about some toast?  Yup.  An empty filler.  A yummy one, but not always the best choice.  Just the 'easy' choice.  So, I've decided to keep an eye on those and get back to the picking of the main course and veg/fruit before I do any 'filler'.  And get back to choosing veg/fruit for snacks.  Or yogurt.  And cut back the other.  Need to get my balance back.  Moderation is only good if you moderate your self!  HA!  Funny but true.

I didn't really get a good weigh-in this AM, so I will try to do that first thing tomorrow.  I want to see where I am.  My last 'official' weight was 179 right after vacay... 6/27.  Dang.  I didn't realize it had been that long, until I checked my page.  Anyways, it's been off and on since vacay.  I keep starting on getting into a good groove then things come up.  At least I'm in my 'range' and not gaining a ton.  But I'm suppose to be going the other way!  Gotta work on that.  This was suppose to be the Summer of moving into a new range.... the 160's.  *sigh*  Not going to happen if I don't get myself into my routine.  I will get there.  Just have to keep moving that direction.

I guess that is about it!  I know what I need to do and that is get my food back in line, get some exercise, and keep busy.   I'll update when I have something to update!  LOL

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Breaking it down

Today when we got up, we just weren't sure what to do with it.  Last night had been the night of overwhelmed feelings.  I felt like I was drowning, if you would like to know the honest to goodness truth!  Every room still needs a little bit of this or a little bit of that and well... when I started thinking about it I started to panic a smidge.  Not to mention, I was panicking about the thought of TWO moves instead of one.  I'll get to that in a minute. 

Anyways, I got to thinking of all we needed to get done here or there and well... my brain just overloaded and I felt for sure like I was going to have a meltdown.  Then hubby and I talked and that somehow made it worse.  Mostly because he was grumpy and tired and was just ready to go to bed and I needed to talk because I felt stressed.  NOT a good combo.  I finally told him I needed him to reassure me that it would be done in time and God had a plan and that everything was ok because I was really feeling overwhelmed.  And he did.  Sometimes he's a butt, but more often he's a good friend and really listens.  He told me that the projects will get done if we just focus on the big things and get those done.  He said that the move will be fine; kiddos are young so even if they have to go through a several changes, they adapt because look at him.  He's right.  I'm worrying over nothing and something I have NO control over.  I knew these things, but it helped me hearing it from him and I calmed down somewhat.  So, we decided not to worry about for the night, not to make any plans, and just go to bed. 

Today, we got up and went over two or three things.  Mostly some light bickering.  LOL  It comes down to the fact that here lately, he says we should focus on the big things, the important things, and leave the other things.  The issue for me, is that when he says it it feels like he's saying the things that are important to me aren't important at all.  :/  I told him so.  He felt bad.  LOL  I didn't mean for that to happen, but... I was kinda glad.  I explained that while he thinks XYZ is important, and I know it is, the issue is that if he's working on it, it's a one man job and I might as well be doing something else other than sitting on my butt!  He got it, then.  But in the end, we've both gotten a LOT done today.  While he worked downstairs on the important plumbing (HEE HEE), I got to work stripping down the kitchen.  I cleaned out all of the upper cabinets and the counter tops.  Then we pulled down all of the cabinets and took them outside.  While he went to work on more plumbing and backer board, I broke down the cabinets removing hardware, doors, cleaning, and then finally sanding and repairing.  After a final wipe down, I made a mental list of what else was to be done to them and brought them back in.  Not sure when I will get to it, but they are ready for a few touch-ups and hand sanding, then primer and paint.  And as I type, hubby is putting up the last piece of backer board in the kitchen.  I still need to do ALL of the bottom cabinets, but it's progress.  And let me tell you, that random orbital sander was worth EVERY SINGLE PENNY.

That first pic is what you use to see as soon as you came to the top of the stairs.  Yes, that is a GREEN counter with a pale blue ugly tile backsplash.  This is what the house looked like when we first bought it. 

These 3 pics are after the first phase of remodel.  You can't see it, but we removed two walls where the island is.  The soffit was also removed.  Or 'bulkheads'.  Not to mention that UGLY ceiling fan.  We took out the horrid green counters AND backsplash.  We took out the 'built in' stove and oven.  The cabinetry that held that, became the island.  We moved the cabinets that were to the right, left and installed an all-in-one range and oven.  This allowed us to put in the over the stove cabinet and micro AND the two LARGE pantries that we placed side by side.  We now have an open floor plan!  That was the end of phase 1. 

Phase 2 was when we did detail stuff.  First, I furniture finished 2 lengths of rubberwood butcher tops for the 'L' part of the kitchen.  The island was wrapped in bead board and has a glass top.  We installed a single light over the sink, work lights under the cabinets, and an island light plus an outlet.  We also installed a garbage disposal, water filtration system, a new faucet, and toe kicks.  Basically, all the working stuff and some of the stuff before finishing.

Phase 3 is where we are now.  The new backer board is in, the cabinets are in the process of being refinished, and then we will put it all back in and have finishing details like the glass back splash, glass floating shelves, and hardware.  I've gone back and forth on that.  Right now, most of the accents in the house are black.  But the shelf brackets are a flat chrome.  I love the open and airy feeling of the glass, but that metal is bugging me.  Thinking of painting them black to match everything else!  But in my bathroom, I have a mix of the two and it works.  Maybe it will in the kitchen... I guess we will see.  If it bugs me, I'll have to fix it. 

As you can see, we've broken this down into do-able sections.  Which is why I'm not sure why I've been so panicky... I should've known.  It's what we usually do!  Break it into manageable sections.  DUH. 

Anyways, that's what I've been up to.  I haven't worked out because I've been OH SO SORE  And then today I've worked lifting and sanding.  I've tracked most of my food, too!  I need to get yesterday's and today's entered.  All in all, just going right along.  Did I mention I have my cycle?  I do.  And man oh man... And yes, I'm working like a dog with it.  It's heavy, but not as painful as normal.  Enough of that.  And enough of this long blog!  Off I go to get these kiddos in bed and attempt to relax.  :)

Sunday, July 13, 2014

Good good

Yesterday was a pretty darn good day.  I got a lot of cleaning done and some organizing.  I also got in a GOOD workout of warm-up, strength, then some cardio.  Food was even good.  Yes, I'm feeling more like my old self.  :)  I am pleased!

Another thing we got done yesterday was some work outside.  Mostly... we had fun!  We decided to go ahead and have a small bonfire and do the rest of the fireworks.  Which really, was darn awesome because that brush pile needed to go and well... that pile of fireworks was sitting on my dining room table!  So, we had fun AND got two things out of the way.  WIN.

Now what is today?  I would work out again, but since I did both yesterday and I am a smidge sore today, I think I am going to focus on loading and hauling.  It was on my list for yesterday, but I just didn't have time.  I think I can do it today if I get started here in a bit.  I may not be able to take off donations, but I sure can take things to the storage unit and recycling.  :)

I guess this is all for now.  Off I go to get started!

Saturday, July 12, 2014

Figured it out...

I was reading on MFP last night about 'fat bashing' and 'fat shaming' and for whatever reason, something in my brain tingled and it hit me -- I've been self sabotaging.  All this time I thought I was over a past incident, but instead of moving on, I've been doing the childish thing of 'rebelling' against it in a subconscious way.  Silly me!  Instead of progressing on, I've held myself back being bratty... to myself!  UGH.  Why do I do that?  WHY???  I have no clue.  All I know is, that I woke up this morning feeling much more like the old me.  Ready to track food, exercise, and get on with my life instead of holding onto rebellious and negative feelings that I had, apparently, been holding in and didn't know I was. 

The funny part is, I am not even really sure what it was about the article that triggered the feeling and the 'ah-ha!' moment.  I was just reading a reply someone wrote and I said to myself, "Ya, like what I'm doing right now."  And BAM.  Yup.  I'm self-sabotaging for NO GOOD REASON.

Today has already been better; actually starting with last night.  I went to bed and actually SLEPT.  I wasn't restless and tense.  I got up feeling darn good and have already gotten my workout in.  I've already tracked my food so far, and I've done a bit of straightening and have more of that planned for here in a minute.  I even made my 'To Do' list last night and I'm ready to work on it once my food settles.  I just feel... more like me.  Weird, huh? 

I'm just glad I am getting somewhere.  I don't like being out of my groove.  I'm very much a routine and level person.  I can deal with the ups and downs, but apparently my brain and body don't like it much.  LOL  I'm always slow to recover.  But, I recover and keep going on.  Even with the slowness, I've not back-pedaled.  I've not gained a ton or given up.  And I won't.  :)

Friday, July 11, 2014

Cranky.... like the Crane

Yeah.  You know you have kids when your current blog title comes from a character from Thomas the Train.  UGH.  But it is EXACTLY how I feel today.  I'm guessing PMS.  Yup.  PMS is probably the evil culprit.  I have no patience, everyone is getting on my nerves, and I'm ready to just explode.  It's lovely!

No, the whole day hasn't been bad or anything.  I'm just... cranky.  And then I got into it with my Mom over politics.  And it was dumb.  She basically said that a business owner can say what they want and do what they want when it's what SHE wants it to be, but then when it goes the other way, then that is WRONG and everyone should BOYCOTT them until they go under.  To me, that is DUMB!  I mean, think of how many people work in these companies that have their own thoughts and feelings.  You stop going there so those people lose their jobs.  Then what?  The rich are already rich and the very folks that need to work are JOBLESS.  All this political BS gets on my nerves.  If you are going to fight for the rights of one and say it's in the name of Constitutional rights, it has to go both ways even if you don't believe it.  Because at the end of the day, it's suppose to be equal RIGHTS.  And not hey, let's punish others for feeling differently.  Burns my buns!


Chai Tea.  YES.  SO MANY TIMES.  I had a chai tea latte yesterday with a friend and now I think I may be hooked. My only problem is, I got some at the store last night and I'll be damned if it isn't no where as good as the other two I've tried.  Big bummer.  One was from a local place and I have NO idea of the brand.  The other was Lipton, which shocked the crap out of me.  This one is Bigelow which isn't a brand I'm all that familiar with, but I got because it said the bags were foil lined to help keep them fresh.  No impressed.  The flavor is quite weak.  :/  And I mean WEAK.  I used two bags today thinking that would give it a boost, but NOPE.  I'm going to use them up anyways because I hate to waste stuff.  So, no biggie.  I just wish I liked it better.  And I think next time I will try decaf.  I need some decaf in my life because I drink enough caffeine.  AND I LIKE IT!  But I know it's a lot.  LOL 

Anyways, I started this blog last night and I'm not in a much better mood today.  I am TIRED.  But at least a few things have gone right.  I managed to snag a cat carrier for our move for only $10!  So, now we have two for the cats and one for the dogs (they typically ride free or share).  I am trying desperately hard to re-home at least ONE of the cats but so far, no luck.  It's sort of driving me crazy.  4 cats are just too many.  I hate to part with any of them, but the house is over-run at this point and new homes must be found.  I know the boys may be upset, but even they have commented that 4 is too much.  If we just re-home one, that would help a lot.  The other may have to be declawed if she stays.  She refuses to let me clip her nails while the other two lie there like pillows and don't fight at all. 

Another thing is that I was able to finally get that tow attachment box!  A guy had the super nice $800 one for $250 and I snatched it up!  SO HAPPY!  It will make moving and travel sooooo much better and easier!

And lastly?  My hair.  Oh boy does it look good!  I love my stylist.  LOVE LOVE LOVE

UGH.  I guess I should TRY to get something done today instead of sitting here like I have been doing.  I wish I didn't feel like this right before my cycle.  I have too much to do and I've managed to do nothing. 

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

It'll happen when it happens!!!

*sigh*  Do you peeps ever feel like people don't listen?  Like, you're on THEIR timeline and if you aren't moving as fast as THEY think you should move, then you're doing it wrong?  Well, that's sorta how I'm feeling now.  The thing is, we finally told people 2 weeks ago that we had made the decision to move to FL this Summer.  We said we HOPED to be moved by Aug. 19th, since that is when school starts down there, but we weren't sure we would make that cut-off.  But we were hopeful.  Other than that, we said there was no real timeline other than wanting to get the house on the market this month, but a lot would depend on weather, how fast certain things got done, and of course the regular day to day things you have to worry about.  An example is paint.  He originally thought he would get to it this week, but now it may be next week since more rain is expected to come in.  It just is what it is. 

But here's the thing.  People keep asking.  Over and over and making somewhat snide comments.  Like, "I thought you were moving?"  I've been trying to be nice in my replies, but the truth is it irks me.  It's like they expect you to snap your fingers and be GONE.  Yeah.... it doesn't work that way!  It's only been about 2 weeks since we decided to let it be known -- mostly for the purpose of networking with other Navy peeps.  But already, people don't get why we aren't gone.  THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T WANT TO SAY IT, YET.  I KNEW this was how it would be.  Instead of taking it for what it was, the preliminary info, people expected us to be up and gone in a day or two.  When the reality is that just because we found a location, that doesn't mean that he is going to get a job immediately (hello?  RECESSION!), or that we will find a house right away (tons of foreclosures!), or that all other arrangements will be done that quickly (school transfers, doc paperwork, etc.).  It just blows my mind that folks seem to think that it should happen over night.  It can take weeks or even MONTHS.  We told the kiddos from the get-go that even though we hoped to be there sooner, it could be up to another year because that is just how it goes.  Just because you want something doesn't mean it is just going to fall into your lap overnight.  They get it -- why can't the grown people?  Maybe it's because many of them haven't moved before and they don't get the amount of work that goes into it.  That's all I can conclude. 

On other notes, diet is about the same.  I think I'm doing pretty good at maintaining.  I know I should be losing, but right now I feel like I'm doing ok just to keep afloat.  I hate when my routine is all up in the air!  And lately, it sure has been.  I haven't even managed to get in any formal workouts.  Which sorta bums me.  Even when I went down the other day to do it, I realized there was so much stuff in the way that it wasn't going to happen.  Maybe purging out there should be next on my list.  It's just so bad down there.  It was straight for maybe a week and then stuff has just piled up and up.  :/  Anyways, so I didn't work out and I sorta feel in a funk.  Not good.  I know it helps me.  I need to just get it done.

On a good note, most of the upstairs is purged even if it is in a state of disarray.  Packing is a lot of work.  UGH.  I've made a few trips to the storage unit and to drop off donations.  I've also listed things for sale.  Selling them would really clear up some major space, but so far nothing has moved and I am getting a bit frustrated.  I'm on FB, craigs, etc. to no avail.  UGH.  About to take a dramatic price cut even though I feel like they were priced low to begin with.  I just remembered LSN.  Think I will try listing some things there tonight and see how that goes.  I'm only messing with things that are worth $10 and up.  And even much of that is getting donated.  I'm just tired of it, ya know?  Sometimes the space it takes up, the time I use to list and meet, and then just the overall hassle isn't worth it.  I'd rather just donate it and move on.  I know I could do a yard sale, but I don't want to.  LOL

Well, I think I am going to get off of here.  I want to straighten up this pantry area and go from there.  We're still working on eating up food out of the freezer and pantry but it has gotten jumbled.  So, time to straighten it up so we can keep making progress.  Plus, if we are going to be working on the kitchen soon, I need to get as much out of the way as possible.  I feel a bit better since venting.  LOL