Foul

Normally, I get up and get going.  I have my coffee, I make breakfast, wash dishes etc.  But nothing gets me going in the morning like the thought of getting to go out to eat.  Oh yes, my friends.  Today was an UP day and I wanted me some Cracker Barrel!  OH NOM NOM NOM!  So, imagine the good mood feelings coursing through me at the thought of not having to do anything but get dressed and go.  Well, we get up, but the hubbs is in a bad mood.  Like, a REALLY bad mood.  Which puts me in a not so happy place.  But I decide we should go anyways if he wants and we do.  Breakfast goes ok, but he's grumpy the whole time.  Which in turn, is making us ALL grumpy.  By the time we got home and he stomped around, I'd had it.  I told him to leave.  I am SO not kidding.  I just stopped, looked at him and said, "You need to go.  Your bad mood is making us all in a bad mood and guess what?  I don't want to deal with it so go and have your downtime and get off my nerve."  Then the jackass tries to come and kiss me!  He was like, what?  No real kiss.  I was like NO WAY.  Finally he leaves.  But let me tell you.  I am in a FOUL MOOD.  FOUL!!!!!!!

Needless to say I went off the deep end.  No, I didn't go crazy eating or anything.  I angry cleaned.  And angry organized!  I don't even remember what I threw away, but my utility closets and vanity are nice and pretty!  LOL  That's what I do when I'm upset -- I clean.  And in a way, I'm glad he made me mad.  Especially on an UP day.  When I'm mad, I somehow manage to get so much done in a really short period of time.  Now I am trying to relax.  Crap.  Washer beeped.  Be right back.  OK, more nasty laundry in.  Boy laundry is so much nastier than girl laundry.  UGH.  And there are 3 in this house.  YUCK.  I feel like all I ever do is WASH.  Dishes, laundry, dogs, kids, MYSELF.  Bleh.  But I'm glad I've gotten so much done today.  You can't really SEE what I've gotten done, but I know I did it and that's all that matters.

I sure hope I can get over being mad, though.  I'm not AS mad, but I am still upset.  I get that he is fried and needs a break, but how does he think I feel?  I do pretty much everything here and all he does is projects and work.  I do projects and everything else!  SERIOUSLY!  And you know, another blogger just wrote about her hubby doing the same with their backyard.  I hope in this situation he just needed some time out and will get his act together.  Cause right now, I don't even want to talk to him.  He just acted like such a butt.  He really has it good around here and yet, he was a BUTT.  I think I have it pretty good, too.  It's just that when he acts like a jerk after all the work I put in for his b-day and every day, it makes me feel like he doesn't appreciate what I do.  I probably could do more, but I think I'd drop dead.  No joke.  Most days I feel like I run non-stop.  The only 'me' time I get is on here.  And that's either squeezed in randomly throughout the day, or at night once everyone has gone to bed.  Aargh.  I feel so annoyed right now and I want that feeling to go away.  I am in a majorly foul mood!!!!

OK, on to something else!  Thanks for all the great comments!  I AM feeling good about finally seeing some movement.  I just hope it keeps going!  IF I was able to lose another 4lbs. this go around, that would put me at 2lbs. per week.  (my cycle is about 2 weeks).  I still probably won't hit my goal of 33.5lbs., but if I were lucky enough to lose 8lbs. for May, that would only put me off by about 9.5lbs.  And you know what?  I'll take it!  And you know what else?  I think I'm only going to weigh every 2 weeks.  It really helped having that space but yet still a deadline.  And I believe it made a world of difference in my state of mind.  I would have good and bad days, but still, it was better than that constant emotional roller coaster.  I know it will be a challenge, but I still look forward to giving it a go.  And maybe it will get easier!  I thought about doing a countdown with it, too.  But we will see.

Well, it's now after midnight and I am just now getting back on here to finish this blog.  The hubby came home in a better mood, but I'm still not feeling all that friendly.  LOL  But I guess we will see how it goes.  I need to go switch out laundry one final time to let the baby things soak and then jump in the shower and head to bed.  I kinda wish the hubby would go on to bed so I could have some quiet time!  The boys were rowdy today.  LOL  But oh well, I am determined to eek out some time to myself at some point to finish my train of thought from earlier.  Well, if I remember it!  HA!  G'night chicks!