LOVE

So, 2hotinhere posted a blog recently about loving herself... as she is and who she is right now and it got me to thinking about me.  Is THAT why this time is different?  Is that why losing slow and steady and trying not to freak out is working?  Not that I'm perfect... I freaked a bit the other day.  But I am MUCH better now than I was say 4yrs. ago.  Have I finally gotten to the point where I love myself enough to do this right?  I sure hope so...  cause that is certainly what this feels like.  This feels like it started out as just a diet to get the baby weight back off and has transformed into a lifestyle change.  And I don't feel like I'm suffering or having to KILL myself.  I'm going slow, but the slow is what they say will be the determining factor in permanent change and keeping the weight off.  And that's my goal.  This is for the rest of my life.  I see my parents living like they do and that is NOT what I imagined my golden years being.  My Dad has lost a lot of weight, but I see my Mom struggle and well, it's hard for me at times.  Because I know... I just KNOW... that if she could just make a few changes, she could lose and feel much better.  Her latest excuse is if she loses, she'll have saggy skin.  I get that!  I worry, too!  But COME ON!  Being here with your family is more important than some skin hanging.  I love her, but she can be very superficial!  I think it stems from her own lack of self esteem.

Ok, on to other things this AM.  Another thing I LOVE is that my weight was still 192.5.  TEE HEE!  I didn't have my cheat day yesterday simply because the hubby will be starting his 7 day Tuesday night and we usually start that off with dinner out.  Then Saturday is date night.  I am really diggin' these date nights!  Although, we talked about taking a weekend trip this weekend.  I'd love to, but what we want to do is go to Ikea.  The issue is our youngest.  Oldest would be fine going.  He'd hate it somewhat, but he is use to going and doing and would be fine.  Youngest... yeah, he would be a pain the WHOLE TIME.  I love him, but I know him.  He doesn't travel very well, hates to be confined, and wants to get into EVERY THING.  He's just not got that easy going personality of our oldest.  He's like me -- never sits still and is into whatever he can.  I am pretty sure our sitter (who is also a close friend) wouldn't mind staying with him, but I hate to be away from him like that.  But I don't know what else to do if we want to go.  If we take him, we won't be able to do anything we need to without having to fight him the whole way.  Aargh!  DECISIONS DECISIONS!

On the exercise front, I went through and got all of my Pilates videos together yesterday.  It took a while, but I got them all on my video player on my Blu-ray.  I LOVE having internet on my TV!  I love not having cable, too!  LOL  So, they are all loaded and ready to go.  I need to re-watch a couple and start getting into the groove.  I also found a couple that will be great for my back since I've had so much pain in the last year.  I'm pretty sure the pain is from not working out!  I know I won't be doing a lot of cardio until the garage or 'gym' is done, but I need to at least do the Pilates and the stretching.  I'm actually feeling excited to get started on it now.  I don't know why... maybe watching the videos helped!  :D

Well, I better be bringing this to an end.  I need to get some housework done and it isn't going to do itself!  Have a great week ladies!  :D