Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Messing w/ ME

The damn scale is messing with me today.  Normally I'm not too obsessive over the numbers anymore.  I may make little tweaks here and there to the diet, but I don't really freak over the scale.  It's not worth it to freak out anymore normally.  But this AM, I did my normal routine and stepped on the scale.  It said 190.5.  WHAT?  I stepped off, shook my head, and stepped on again.  190.5.  WHAT????  I was so startled, I stood there and got on again and 192.  ASS.  I use to weigh 3 times and ALWAYS take the highest number.  But recently because I hadn't been getting ANY mixed numbers, I was only weighing twice and just putting that in the calendar for tracking and going on with it.  But I was so annoyed I walked into the kitchen, started coffee and got breakfast going for youngest, and went back in and weighed again.  It flashed 190.5 then 191.  I did this 3 times.  Same number all 3 times.  Damn you scale.  DAMN YOU!  I shouldn't let it bug me, but this AM it did.  I shouldn't have stepped on there the 3rd time the first time around.  I was just so shocked!  I don't know how on Earth I could've lost that amount.  That would be a 2lbs. from yesterday and 1lb from Sunday.  The 191 is more realistic and what I'm going to take.  Man.  Only 1.5lbs. from the 180's!  :O  I guess that the scale being an ASS is more bearable when thinking of it that way.

I'm also sorta surprised because I'm feeling a bit stressed.  We got the news that a close friend of the family's Grandmother passed away just a couple of days ago then last night a close friend of mine from high school posted that her Dad had died.  That's 2 in one week.  And then my Mom and I sorta had a disagreement over funerals.  It's silly and I just sorta deflected after that, but it sorta bugs me.  It's like in this day and age, people have forgotten to show any respect or support for each other during that time.  We're all quick to post things or send texts or whatever, but when it comes to actually seeing people and doing whatever, no one does it anymore.  Which in many ways makes me sad.  The issue with my Mom is I said something about driving down to go to the Wake and she darn near had a cow.  Said he wasn't family and it wasn't necessary.  I told her it wasn't for him, but for the family, the Mom and my friend.  She was like, 'Well, they didn't come to Granny's funeral.'.  No, no they didn't.  But truthfully, not many people knew or were even given time to come.  It was literally one of those things where she died and then was buried the next day.  She was 99, so yeah.  It was already planned so there was little to no span of time.  And even though in small to moderate towns word travels fast, it didn't travel THAT fast so only the closest of family members came.  And that wasn't many.  You see, the last of my family line is coming.  My Aunt never had children and then I only have one brother.  And of all of my Granny's family, many of them have passed and didn't have children or their children are much older.  So... the line is coming to an end.  There just weren't many people to come to the funeral.  But this was a younger man.  And I pretty well knew him my whole life.  I guess I no longer know what the proper etiquette is for death.  Does anyone else know?  I guess it's easy enough to say just go if you want to or don't if you don't.  But I feel torn.  UGH.

BTW, yesterday was a nice lazy day.  We sorta just sat around and took it easy all day and we really needed that.  Hubby and I talked about his diet and his progress.  I think he got a bit frustrated and I told him not to get mad with me... I wasn't trying to tell him what to do.  I was just trying to be supportive and help him think it through because he's lost doing it so he obviously knows what he's doing.  He calmed down and was like, I think you may be right.  Even though his carbs are fairly low and in theory his cals would be because of that too, he was eating so much fat to compensate for carbs that in reality his cals were much higher than what they should be.  He said after thinking on it that I was probably right.  I pointed out that he would eat eggs at breakfast cooked in oil or butter with cheese, then toast with butter and peanut butter, and then a banana.  That is a LOT of fat, cals, and a bit high on carbs.  Bananas are higher in carbs, but he gets ill without them.  BAD headaches if he skips a day.  It's weird.  Anyways, between butter, PB, and cheese... I think that is what was putting him over.  He added it all up yesterday and said he thought I was right -- he had to be eating almost 1000 cals. more than he needed.  So, he said he was going to count his cals over the next few days and focus on eating lower carb items.  Which is similar to what I do now.  I don't really 'watch' carbs anymore, but when I do eat them, especially when it comes to pasta or bread, I try to make them quality.  But bread and potatoes aren't a main staple of my diet.  I love pasta, though.  LOVE.  LOL  I eat most of my carbs at my afternoon snack and dessert.  Supposedly a fairly high carb dessert before bed helps you to sleep.  But there are times I just want some cheese and crackers or berries with whipped cream.  Just depends on my mood.

Well, I need to be bringing this to an end.  This is getting LONG.  Hope everyone is having a good start to the week now that Monday is over.  LOL  I'm not sure what today will bring, but I'm hoping to be a bit lazy again.  The rest of the week and into the weekend will probably be busy, so I'd rather have another down day as awful as that may sound.  Take care everyone!


  1. My scale is pretty much possessed too. I have to weigh, then step off and let it completely turn off, then weigh again. Then sometimes I repeat the process a third time. If I don't... it'll flash 47 numbers at me, then settle on one it never even showed me while it was doing it's spazzy flash thing.

    Also, I've tried weighing myself, then picking up the cat, and weighing again and it'll JUST show the first weight. My cat is definitely heavy enough to register at least 6-7 pounds. hah So... I hate my scale as well. I bought it forever ago and I bought it for the wrong reasons. I have NO idea if it's a nice scale... But it's all glass with a nice looking display on top. Basically I bought it because it's pretty. haha

    My bf is on this fun journey with me, and I get so mad at him because he'll be on plan with me at meal times, and then snack to his heart's content between meals and STILL loses at the end of the week. So unfair...

  2. Oh I know exactly how you feel! I've done the scale dance! And I don't understand how it can change like that. I always regret stepping on that last time,it really brings my mood down! I'm with you on the whole paying respect thing at funerals. My best friends dad passed away this week. I didn't know him at all. My friend had a lifetime of troubles with her relationship with her dad. Minutes before he passed away,we were talking on the phone,and she saw a glimmer of regret and a conscience in him while he was on his death bed. She really started to mourn his sad life,and the relationship she never had with him,and that hope that he would could change. Now he passed away,and she is dealing with many crazy emotions. As a friend I will be attending his funeral this Thursday. It only seems proper to me. So I totally get where your coming from! Aaaaaaaand congrats on your scale movement! Your so close to the 180's!!!!!!

  3. It's super hard to find a balance between being supportive of your significant other and being the police. I struggle with it with my boyfriend too. It's glad he's so receptive. I like to point things out too and I try not to make it sound like I'm being critical.

    I think it's nice you wanted to drive out to the funeral to support the family.

    Good luck with everything!

  4. Thanks jewelz! Yes 50 pounds is a big deal! I guess I just don't feel that different yet! Im glad I have accomplished this. Don't get me wrong,there are times I am proud of it. But most times,I'm just doing my thing,changing my lifestyle,and I don't really realize it! But thanks for your encouragement all the way! I believe you were one of the first people to comment on my blog!

  5. I *try* not to double weigh because I know how finicky the darn things can be, I've had them that varied up to 3 pounds! Uhg, horrible! BTW: Blogging over at blogger now, new address is http://pepagirl.blogspot.com/, come visit some time!

  6. hEY :)

    Thank you for your kind comment! :) You were there for me during the very bad time when I was struggling, and you are still here. I really appreciate your kindness ^_^ I'm so happy I have met you on here!

    As for your relationship with the scale, I think your not the only one! :) I'm sure everyone on here have once or twice get annoyed because the scale is messing with them.

    But I remember reading that your weight changes hourly throughout the day. I think it has to do something with your salt concentration and how much your cells retain water. But either way, the overall average number is your "equilibrium" weight. Either way, I think there is still something to celebrate about. Your definitely moving in the right direction, and your days is 180s will come. It's only a matter of days! :)

    You are truly a role model to many people in the 3fatchicks community! I, personally, really look up to you and how far you have come to be where you are on your weight goal! :)

  7. I think it is a little strange that your mom would have anything to say about you wanting to drive to a wake. If you feel that it is the right thing to do, you should definitely do it regardless of what your mother thinks. A wake is not just for family members. The whole point is to show up to be supportive and pay respects.
    Sorry that you are having a rough week.


Feel free to comment -- I love reading them and I try to respond! :D