Sunday, March 4, 2012
So, here I am! Now you all know what I look like. This is actually a current pic from January when I decided that the pic on my FB page had sat there long enough without being changed. LOL It's nothing fancy. I literally grabbed my camera on a decent day and just snapped a few shots. I think I have on just some eye make-up. And yes, I wear those big ol' hoopty earrings pretty much daily. I love big earrings! I'm not sure why, but I do. Always have. LOL
Anyways, as you can see from the title, I'm updating. I did my weight first and was disappointed to see that from last week, there was no change. Still 191.5. At first, I was really mad. Mostly because if anything, I've been UNDER this week on cals. Even with the one night of going out, I've been where I should be and like I said, had a day or two of lower cals than the 1600. Closer to 1400. So, I was very angry that I had been so good only to get on the scale and see that I hadn't lost anything. But then I got to thinking about it and realized that I needed to get over it. There are several reasons why my weight could have stayed the same and in the end, none of them are worth getting mad about because they are out of my control. Such as deaths, illnesses, awful weather, etc. The stress from all of that I'm sure made a difference. Even though I didn't eat to compensate for it, I still think it did something chemically to my body. Especially after spending the night stuffed into the overflow pantry in my basement with my kids, my SIL, my dogs, and our emergency gear. It was a long stressful night. We were REALLY lucky that we were spared. Several towns under 100 miles from here are destroyed. Middle TN got hit HARD and it's been a mess. We had 3 touchdowns here, but luckily when it hits the valley, it seems to break up and miss us some. That's why the storms last April were so freaky. Back to my point, between all of that and the fact that I should start my period in the next day or two, I'm not overly shocked. Disappointed, yes. Shocked, no. But I'm not giving up.
So, that means that over the last two months I've only lost 5lbs. Which sorta blows. Only because I had really hoped to be closer to my high number of 16lbs. at this point. I'm off by 11lbs. And from my low number, I'm only off 3. But still. I would've at least liked to be down 6lbs. BLEH. I'm trying not to be too down, really, but it's frustrating. I know, I know.... it's probably because I'm not exercising. You're probably right. But on a good note from all of these storms, a big chunk of my garage got cleaned out so I may be able to at least get in some walking time soon! LOL Hubby is anxious to be working out now since he is FINALLY seeing some good results! :D
Speaking of hubby... he was right. I told him that in the last month or two, I hadn't felt like I was losing but was glad that it looked like I was because he said my stomach area seemed so much smaller. When I did my measurements today, turns out he was right! The only place I really lost was my tummy area! Which after the disappointment of the lack of loss actually made me feel better. Mostly because when I had started to gain, my stomach is what seemed to explode. And I have a lot of fattiness there. So, to be losing that makes me VERY happy! I have a pretty curvy figure. I'm very close to hourglass, but would probably be considered a pear as my butt, hips, and thighs are really full. So, when I lose I don't lose as fast there. I also tend to put on muscle there very easy. I think if we get the garage set up, I may very well go back to some weight training. I think that will help my hips and thighs more than anything. I still want to walk and do Pilates, but I think the weight training will help my muscles fill out a bit and get rid of the saggy skin. I honestly think the reason it's gotten mushy is lack of muscle from not working out. Not even doing much walking. So, I gotta do this. I should post my 'skivvies' pic just to show where my problem area really is! LOL
I added 4 pics to my Pix page. I hate the photo uploader here! UGH! I couldn't get them on the page where I wanted and they are all crammed together. Then again, I didn't really take the time to play with them much, so maybe I could figure it out if I did. Anyways, I hope to add one or two more pics later if I can. Hubby will be up and I should be able to play with the camera some. I want to take a pic in that red dress again and then one in my new bathing suit for tracking. I didn't want to post the skivvies pics cause it's basically bra and underwear, but I did want SOMETHING to go by. I talked to a friend and she said I should do a bathing suit. BRILLIANT! So... I bought a bikini top (I already had a plain black skirt bottom thing). I haven't worn a bikini in... I won't post how long cause it will make me feel old! HA! But it's just a plain black one and I want to use it for tracking. Will I ever wear it in public? We'll see... I normally wear tankini's, so I don't know if I will ever be brave enough to wear the bikini top. I am going to start using some Mederma, but my stretch marks are pretty big from having my second. I barely had any with oldest, but man, I got SO BIG with my second. I would post a pic, but you'd swear I altered it! LMAO
So, I guess that is about it for today! I've gotten braver and uploaded a pic of me, updated all my pages, and told you about buying a bikini. The only other thing I wanted to post about is a blog that I read that other day that talked about taking time for yourself. And that's when it hit me that I've been spending lots of time on the net just messing around, not getting much done, feeling tired and whatever and it hit me that I was displaying signs of depression. SO much had been going on this week and I had felt drained and then I realized that not only this week, but slowly over the last couple of months I've been letting myself slowly slip away. And it's the little things... wasting time on mindless stuff on the net rather than doing something I REALLY want to do. Not taking as much time to 'primp' as I use to. Just random things. They've all added up. And I wonder if exercise is the same? Is it something I'm denying myself? This blog is about the only tool I've been using and now I'm thinking I need to REALLY use it. I need to get on here and blog but not do the other stuff so much. I need to support others and read blogs and then get off of here and not continue to be in a slump. Maybe it was Pepa who was talking about taking time for her? Anyways, it hit me I need to do all these things for myself. Blog, take the time to shave and pluck, do my nails, read a book, and even exercise. I've just let it all go slowly over time and it's hitting me that due to lack of a social life, I've just been letting the things that I need and want go. That shits gotta stop! NOW! I started last night. I played a game because I wanted to then got off the pute. I took a nice LONG hot shower (most of my showers are 15 and under) and even shaved up everything! It was something small, but I RARELY shave all in one night anymore. I know this may sound weird but even though I was going to bed alone since hubby was at work, I felt sexy and more confident. I need that back! So, going to attempt to take some more time for me. I know realistically this won't happen all of the time, but I've gotta start somewhere. And I want to enjoy these things more and not rush so much. I'm rushing so much I'm forgetting how to just really relax. I use to even enjoy dying my hair and anymore it's a chore I rush through. Nope. No more. Gotta start feeling GOOD about these things and appreciate who I am right now in this life and stop 'forgetting to smell the roses'. Or for me, gardenia's... love those.
Ok, now that I've written a novel, it's time to move onwards and upwards with my day. Snacks are needed, hubby will be up soon, and I have tons I'd like to get done. Hope everyone is having a great weekend! And I hope all of my bloggy buddies made it through the storms ok. :)
**Insert** BTW, do I look like you thought I would??? Just curious...