Saturday, May 17, 2014

I think I'm stressed...

So much so, that my period has taken flight and has decided not to come on time.  Which is flat out pissing me off since vacay is in a couple of days and I'll probably end up getting it there.  BULLSHIT.  We're going to the freakin' BEACH.  I don't want to be bleeding like a stuck hog while I am there or it will be NO FUN.  UGH.  So annoyed at my body right now.  REALLY.  I have no idea how I could be prego, but I'm wondering about it at this point.  We went through a sort of dry spell thanks to schedules and all that, so I don't know how we could've magically conceived, but I am about to the point of taking a test just to rule that crap out! 

On top of this, my freakin' laptop fell and DIED.  Completely and utterly dead.  I am SO mad.  It's my own fault, but this is two times it has died in the last year and a half.  But it is now dead and every single thing lost.  All my saved passwords, all of my bookmarks... all of it!  UGH.  I am NOT a happy person with this.  But I am doing the best I can to reset them and save them on the hubby's lappy which is what I am on now.  As of this moment, I have no intention of saving that laptop again.  We are thinking of moving to a desktop and setting up a home server to keep this from happening again.  I really don't need a laptop so I'm agreeing with the hubbs.  I'm just glad that I am not one of those people who takes tons of photos or whatever or I would be seriously upset right now.  But I will live.  I am just frustrated.  But no point.  Might as well move on and get to work on what I CAN do.  Which is getting all of that moved over.

Then there was the little issue of my husband's job.  Some bad stuff happened there night before last and well... who knows.  Just sick of him being there, truth be told.  Their ways of running a company don't sit well with me -- AT ALL.  I hate to leave here, but when the time is right, I know it will happen.

Diet and food are about the same.  I'm riding and getting some fairly consistent workouts in and enjoying it a lot.  I've only had one super high calorie day in the last 2 weeks, and I had worked out a lot this week so I'm ok with it.  Only really over by like 200 cals so I figure it balances over time.  But my bike time is working out nicely.  I may do a ride today, but it's going to be an easy one.  I had an average cadence of 11.8 yesterday and I was pretty happy with that.  I'll never be an 'on the road' biker, but I enjoy this.  I'll probably never be a runner, either, but enjoy sprints. I just like changing it up and doing stuff that is fun for me.  And that changes day to day.  Also, I did check my weight this AM and saw 177.5... which if I ever get my period would be spot on!  Come on already!

On another note, I was super pleased yesterday when I was trying on my clothes that the vast majority still fit nicely.  I was only a bit heavier than this last year, but for some reason in my head I kept thinking things weren't going to fit.  It was weird!  But they fit just fine.  Some were loose.  I liked that!  Why I thought that things wouldn't fit when I'm lighter now, I have no clue. But it kept going through my head.  The only thing I've noticed that I didn't like was that my inner thighs look... gross.  There for a while, they looked way better but now they look all weird again.  I got to thinking about that because at first I was super annoyed.  But then I realized that the last time when they did that, it was when I dropped weight/size again.  They looked that way for a bit, but then smoothed out.  It's like my body looks funny from releasing the fat and then it smooths back out when things slow down.  It's easier to accept that.  I'm really hoping that is what it is.  Either way, I'm not going to stress over it.  My body has been doing darn great lately and well... I can't complain. My stretching seems to be getting deeper and I feel more relaxed after.  I've been able to do more even with my back still slightly sore.  You already saw my biking stuff.  And overall, I just can't hold this against it.  Besides, who cares?  Everyone has stuff they hate about their body.  I'm just going to keep going on, ya know?

Well, speaking of, I better get going on.  I hate the hubby's laptop sometimes.  Hard to type on here.  But I'm thinking I will be cutting back whether I want to or not now that we are sharing.  *sigh*  So, sorry if I'm not as active on here.  Until we get a new home system or something, my time on here will probably be limited.  Until next time!


  1. Sorry about your laptop. My lappy has crashed a few times. The first time it was still covered under warranty, so they sent somebody to fix it. The second time I paid maybe seventy five bucks to get it fixed, and the third time Chris ended up fixing it. I had to reformat and wipe everything, and then he put a different operating system on it. I was able to save my documents, and pictures, so that's something. I'll totally cry when this laptop kicks off though. New ones are expensive.
    I'm really grateful that your husband wasn't hurt in that accident. Scary!
    You guys definitely need a vacation.

    1. Sadly, it's a total loss unless some recovery software will do it. But it will have to wait... too much going on right now to spend too much time on it, ya know? We have a few options. We can either get a new hard drive or a new machine. And for our purposes, seems better to get a new machine. I think this time, we're going to get a desk top.


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