Saturday, June 2, 2012


I am feeling pretty darn yucky right now.  I don't think I overdid it yesterday, but that is sorta how I feel.  Really hoping that after some coffee and meds I get to feeling better.  Because right now, I just feel gross.  And feeling this way, I'm not going to get very much done at all.  So, going to hope that having my coffee and then taking some of my meds like Sudafed and maybe some Ibuprofen gets me back to feeling better.  Bleh.  Not liking this!  I felt bad yesterday morning, too, until I took meds and then BAM!  I got SO much done.  I am hoping for that today.  Not that I have a ton to do, I just would LIKE to get a lot done!  If I could have 3 or 4 really productive days each week, I'd be doing great.  As it is, I feel like most days I'm just staying above water.  LOL  In other words, getting just enough done so that I don't get behind.  I'd like to get ahead!  I got some housework done yesterday along with some little projects that I've been trying to get done for a while now.  That felt good to knock those out!  Not only did it get something done, but it also cleaned out a few spots.  I guess it just hit me that it looks better just looking around.  I mean, those things are not only up to look at now (I mostly hung some art and things that I had been meaning to for a while), but the floors and shelves look neater without them just laying around!  I also did some work in my oldest's room and moved a few things in youngest's room.  Nothing huge or dramatic, just things that need to be done.  Slowly but surely!  Huh.  I guess home remodeling is like weightloss -- progress not perfection.  But I'm a bit of a perfectionist, so that is hard for me at times!  More so on the house than the weightloss.  At least I think so!

My weight this AM is 188.  And let me tell you, I've was so happy to see a that number!  Why?  Aunt Flo stopped by to see me today.  I know she'll be tagging along for the next few days.  So, I was super shocked to have that AND see 188!  I normally gain a ton of water weight during this time.  So, THAT is why I was super stoked over the 188.  My only problem now is that I am HUNGRY.  Like, stark raving MAD hungry!!!  So, I guess here in a min, I better get my tushy in the kitchen and get something to eat.  Most days I'm not even hungry until well after noon, but it's not even 10:30 and my stomach is growling something fierce.  Normally I'd wait to see if I was really hungry, but this sure feels like real hunger!  Probably because of my cycle.  I read somewhere that for a few days up to and right after starting your cycle you have a higher calorie range.  Not sure if it is true, but it sure feels like it right now!  LOL  So, I'm going to go ahead and eat.  I see no point in waiting if I am genuinely hungry.

I have a question for you ladies out there -- when in your weightloss did you start to feel... normal?  I am going to post this question on the forums, too, but I was wondering if any of you out there had a point where you felt that way?  I ask because I don't think I feel normal all the time.  I do have days, moments, times when I don't think about my weight and when I just walk around feeling normal.  But then there are days I feel fat and awkward.  And I'm honestly starting to think that never goes away.  So, I'm wanting to find a way to embrace that.  I think by embracing it, it may take the awkwardness out of it and just be what it is.  Because I think even at my goal weight, I am going to have 'fat' days and days where I feel like I could/should do more.  And the truth is, I don't just feel like as the weight goes, the mentality goes.  So, I want to deal with it and take away it's power!

It is now the end of the day.  I did take meds and I did indeed start feeling better and I got SO much done!  I even talked the hubby into doing just ONE project!  He hung the new wine bottle holders up.  It took us a bit to figure out how we wanted them up, but they are now up and I LOVE them!  Just one more thing that is now officially off of our extensive list!  Also, I dug through some more clothes and found some stuff for youngest.  THEN, I worked on oldest's room.  It is MUCHO improved!!!!  The Ikea stuff we bought made a HUGE difference.  HUGE.  I am SO glad that we got it!  It has helped so much.  So much so that now we don't 'need' to buy a new bed.  We can if we want, but we don't HAVE to. Now to get him a few other things and we will be set.  He keep saying he wants red as it is his fave color.  He has black, navy blue, and red now.  He says he doesn't want the blue anymore so we are thinking of moving some of it to youngest's.  It won't be a hard transition.  There isn't that much in there that is blue.  Just a pillow back, a bed skirt, a quilt set, and his curtains.  There are some baskets, too.  All of that could be replaced.  Or I could leave part of it.  I guess we will see.

Well, I need to get off of here and eat my dinner plus get my crazy kids in the bed.  They are dancing and acting crazy and I for sure need some downtime.  All this cleaning and stuff has worn me out!  I may even go to bed early tonight.  :O  Shock of shocks!  Hope everyone has a great weekend!


  1. 188! That is so great! (haha, I am being supportive AND it rhymed) You sure are moving right along.
    Everybody has "fat" days. Some days we just feel garbagey, and it probably has nothing to do with weight at all. We see a beast in the mirror, and we can't figure out what is wrong. I have many days when I don't feel fat, and I feel quite beautiful, and I am once again just over 200 - so I have now come to accept that my brain and body aren't really all that in sync. Having "pretty thin" days, and "fat ugly" days are just a part of the equation.
    I think the trick is getting yourself to snap out of it when you are having a fat day. Instead of punishing yourself more, do something nice for yourself. Take a relaxing bath, get your hair cut or done, or go for a walk somewhere pretty and peaceful. I completely agree with you on finding ways to embrace the feeling and take away its power.

  2. Hi Jewlz!

    Listen, I can gain literally 10 lbs overnight! Especially if Aunt Flo just stepped off the bus! I've been like this since my 20s and so I don't panic over it anymore, although my doctor put my behind on water tablets after my stint in the hospital. Ever since she did that losing weight has been a little easier since I don't have to fight the water issue.

    This is gonna sound so weird but honestly when I hit the 240s I actually began to be happy about my weight for stretches at a time. Yes, happy. I'm not 312. I'm not 280. I'm not 270 (which I tended to get stuck at in the past). I'm in my 240s for the first time in 10-12 years and I gotta say it feels wonderful. Am I still huge? You bet. But I feel far better about myself than I have in years and years. Hope this helps ya, Jewlz. :)

  3. Oh I was just thinking this today. I feel like a
    WHALE!!!!! No matter how much weight I've lost,there just some days when I look in the mirror,and I see the exact same person I did almost 70 pounds ago. It's quite frustrating!!!!!! I get exactly where your coming from. And it's super awesome that you have a good AF weight!!!!! .


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