Friday, December 21, 2012

A break?

Could I get a break please?  Seriously.  We get one step forward only for it to feel like an entire jump back.  We're fighting the sickness again here.  Mostly my oldest.  It started on Sunday night.  He was fine all day and then threw up a couple of times.  I was like, what the heck?  But I kept him home from school Monday to be safe.  He was fine most of Monday and then ran a random fever Monday night so to be safe, I kept him home Tuesday.  But that evening, he was fine so I let him go on to school Weds.  He was fine all that day and evening and on into the night.  Thursday morning right before the alarm went off, he starts throwing up again.  I was like for frickin' real???  So, he does his thing and goes back to sleep.  Obviously, he didn't go to school.  Then off an on all day he is screaming and crying and throwing up.  At his 4:20 Doc appt., they basically wasted my time and told us to go to the ER in DOWN TOWN.  Lets keep in mind it was after 5PM, it was pouring the rain and cold, and my kiddo wasn't dehydrated or anything.  They just said maybe go to be 'safe'.  I asked what they would do for him and they said just some fluids.  I was like, well, I can't just go down there right now.  If he doesn't improve, I'll go.  But after being out in the cool air, he seemed better and wanted a few sips of water.  He kept that down.  He kept hurting, but he was keeping it down.  He managed an entire glass of water over a couple of hours.  So there was no reason to go to the ER.  And even if I was going to go, I'm not going to go all the way to that one when there is a fantastic hospital right here.  No, it's not a pediatric hospital, but I don't believe you need one for dehydration!  Which, he DID NOT HAVE YET!  UGH.  THIS is why our healthcare system is all jacked up.  I should be able to take my child to his Pediatrician and be able to get some kind of answer other than just take him to the ER!  What's the point of a regular Doc then?  THAT is why the damn ER is flooded all the time!  People don't want to double pay.  AARGH.  The only thing they did was confirm it wasn't the Flu, Bronchitis, or Pnuemonia.  I was pretty sure the first two were a no already.  I'll quit complaining now.  UGH.  On a good note, since it's been a while since I first started this, he is now eating and drinking some.  But I plan on keeping him on a bland diet for a day or two to be sure.  Here's to hoping it is done in our house.

Ok, on to other things.  My weight yesterday after eating (cause I forgot again) was 188.5.  I am hoping and thinking that means that I am about 186 first thing in the AM.  I'll try to weigh tomorrow, but no promises since I'm pretty worn out.  I actually slept on the floor in my kiddos room last night and he was up a lot.  But I preferred that to keeping up hubby who had to go to work.  Plus, it was easier to just raise my head and check him than to jump up and run in there.  I probably actually got more sleep that way.  And man alive was I thankful for a heated throw!  His room is over our garage and even though it's insulated, the floor gets sorta cool.  So that throw was fabulous!  I think if it wasn't for that, I wouldn't have slept much at all.  My youngest, thankfully, only got up once that I can remember.  I'm doing ok for now, but I don't want to overdo it and make myself sick.  So, I took my acidophilus last night, I'm only doing a few things around the house, drinking lots of water, going to take my vitamin, and maybe try to catch a nap later.  I just wish it would snow as dumb as that may sound.  Yeah, sudden change of subject for sure.

So, I've been thinking about how I want to go with this year coming up.  I'm overall happy with 2012 and feel like I've done pretty well.  But I do think that 2013 is the year I need to really make some big movements in weight.  And what has gotten me to that thought?  Sleeping on the floor last night.  Now, I know that no matter what weight, once you reach a certain age, sleeping on the floor just isn't fun.  But its even harder if you're overweight.  So, this year, I'd like to get to the 160's.  I know I can do it.  I could've done it last year.  But I think I need to put more focus on it and get there this year.  Not sure if I will make it to the 150's.  I know it's not a crazy goal, but I just don't want to push so hard I fall off of the wagon.  Because that IS the type of person I am.  I push myself too hard and I have a hard time getting back in gear.  Better to just do it in a slow and steady manner and make it a permanent part of my life.  I think I would've been in the 170's by now if I had stuck with working out.  But the hip thing has really thrown me for a loop.  I keep hoping it will stop hurting, but so far it still has painful moments.  Not sure if that is normal or not, but it seems like it is.  But I could've at least gotten back to walking/biking and I haven't.  That's my own laziness.  Well, and other random stuff that has happened.  I know it happens to everyone, but it seems like the older you get, the more kids you have, and the more you have going on the harder it is to talk yourself into doing certain things.  Especially if your husband happens to be going to Engineering school and you've had major job issues and family issues.  But it's like that for everyone.  Everyone has their own drama going on and many of you out there still manage to do it.  So, I'm going to call it what it is and it's laziness.  I could've done better.  But I'm proud I went down, didn't gain, and I've continued to keep a positive attitude.  For me, it's not just about the numbers but the journey.  And so far, this has been a positive journey for me because of that.  It feels permanent and not like I'm just doing this as a short term fix.  I like that.  :)

Overall, I'm going to continue what I'm doing and continue to find ways to be positive and enjoy the journey.  Maybe I can even get that hubby of mine to take some better care of himself.  LOL  He does pretty well most of the time, but when he's stressed, he's like me and we like to enjoy good food and a glass of wine.  But we all need that once in a while.  What's the point of losing weight and lookin' good if you're miserable and not enjoying life?  There's not.  It's not worth it to me to kill myself to be a certain weight if I can't even enjoy life.  And that's why the slow and steady works for me -- it has to be all about balance.

Ok, going to get off of here for now.  I need to try to do a few things, just not overdo being so tired.  I vacuumed really well and have been sitting here for a bit so I think I will try to do dishes and put away some laundry.  The house is in pretty good shape after the cleaning spree I did the other day.  Just need to stick with it and not let it get bad even if I don't feel well.  Or putting it back together is torture!  I hope to maybe shampoo the rug tomorrow -- it looks awful.  And I mean AWFUL.  My youngest has been hard on it.  I am going to try to clean it again myself and then if it still looks bad, may hire out for it.  Last resort is replacement.  I hate to even think of that!  It's a 13X10 so NOT CHEAP!  :O  Off I go.   Have a good weekend!


  1. I hope this isn't too late! But Merry Christmas! :)

  2. Dang, you guys need a sick-free month for sure. That would have made me furious too- being told to go to the ER. Dehydration isn't exactly an emergency, and they ought to have tried to help you out a little more. The healthcare system here is totally jacked.
    I plan on getting into the 160s this year too. My goal is to lose 1 1/4 pounds a week, which I feel is reasonable. I ought to have been able to drop more this year, but there was just too much stress. Laziness plus stress equals too much thinking about making changes and not enough action on my part.


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