Thursday, May 16, 2013

Lost it

Lost my mojo for the last couple of weeks and just couldn't seem to get back into the groove of what I was doing.  I'm not sure what is going on with me, but it is just one of those things where I've not been 'on it'.  Overall, I've not been terrible, I've just not been blogging.  I don't know why, but I've just felt like I've not had anything valid to say, so I've not even been doing my food log.  I even did my weigh-in with nothing good to report -- 181.5.  Granted, the week before was 178.5 which is maintaining, but still.  And then the 181.5 was during my cycle.  So, overall I'm maintaining right now.  I want to work on losing, but I can't seem to get the gears going again.

I'm not really sure what is going on, but I think it is burnout.  I had 4mos. of steady loss and now that I am in month 5, it's like I just can't seem to do it anymore.  I'm not eating crazy or whatever, I'm just not eating great.  I'm not being lazy, just not formally working out.  Honestly, not sure what has gotten into me.  I'm just.... off.  And I don't like it.  I made the decision today to do my food log.  I also made the decision yesterday to do my squat challenge even though I didn't want to.  I had taken a couple of days off since my knees were so sore.  But 130 squats later, I'm good.  LOL  Maybe I just need to do it even if I don't feel like it.  I know I won't be making a huge change over the next week (vacation starts next week), but I'm not doing it for that.  I'm doing it because I don't want to fall off track.  Maintaining is good and all, but I want to keep going and feel like I'm in my normal groove.  I want to watch what I eat, eat healthy, and get in some exercise.  I just hate that I've hit burnout this month.  I felt it coming on in April.  I saw the signs.  But what can you do?  Nada.  Just have to ride the tide of emotions and not let it overtake.  I've seen too many fall off of the wagon and gain gain gain.  I don't want to do that.  At least something has been sticking since I'm basically staying where I am in my window.  I'm not going up and up... but I'm just bouncing around.  And at a bit over 25lbs. left to lose, well, bouncing around is just a waste of time.  I'm not really in any hurry, but bouncing around seems pointless.  So, I really need to find my motivation, groove, and mojo.  I need to remind myself why I'm doing this and how I'm going to get there.  I know this is rambly, but yeah, apparently I needed to write it out and read it in black and white.

Today's Food:

1 blueberry bagel -- 260
1tbsp. creamy PB -- 95
drizzle of honey -- 15
4 strawberries -- 15
Coffee -- 0
Breakfast Total:  385

2 Palmiers cookies -- 220
Coffee -- 0
Snack Total:  220

Yakisoba noodles -- 400
water -- 0
Lunch Total:  400
I'm saying 400 because I honestly didn't eat the whole thing.  I actually made it for my youngest and he didn't want all of the veggies, so I took them out and set them to the side for the hubb's to have in his omelet.  Then he ate part of the noodles, but didn't finish it.  So, when it was time for me to eat, I hated to waste them so I ate them.  But just them and nothing else.

2.5 eggs -- 200
1.5tbsp. butter -- 75
2 slices of toast -- 120
2tbsp. ED spread -- 50
coffee -- 0
Dinner Total:  445
I rounded up here.  I had butter and spread, but I didn't really measure it.  But meh, I'm sure I stuck something in my mouth like a piece of cereal that the round up can cover!  HA!

I'm at 1450 for the day and I'm feeling good with that.  I haven't over eaten or under eaten.  I've just sort of gone with the flow.  I haven't done my workout, but I will soon.  Well, maybe not a 'full' workout, but for sure my challenge and maybe a bit more just to make it worth it.  I had planned on doing a great workout, but by the time I cleaned my house, my buyer came and left, then hubby was up, oldest was home, and then an unexpected trip to the store and then unexpected company when I got back... well, everything is off track.  So, I think even though I won't get in a full workout (aka, cardio) I am going to at least get my challenge in and some more toning/calisthenics.

1 bowl of kettle korn -- 140
water -- 0
Dessert total:  140

Today's total:   1590
Woot!  AND I did my squats.  :)

1 comment:

  1. I totally feel this post! I've fallen off the blogging wagon but I'm slowly motivating myself to come back.

    We all have times when we need a pick-me-up now and then. I know I took little breaks here and there but then dug deep and continued on.

    A few things that help me get going..

    1.) Re-read or revisit old photos/posts
    2.) Figure out if there are any stressers that I'm ignoring in my life
    3.) Read other people blogs
    4.) Fake-it until I make it
    5.) Mini-goals / rewards

    Good luck with everything!


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