Wednesday, February 11, 2015

One of THOSE days

I'm having one of those days where my motivation and joy is at a low.  VERY low.  I just don't feel like things are going anywhere.  I shouldn't feel that way, I guess.  Progress on the house is happening, the school year is moving along, etc. and so on.  But I mean I feel like we are making zero progress on the job and moving front.  It's just not happening.  Which means I am beginning to wonder if it is suppose to.  It just seems like nothing is happening.  Because, it's been nearly 9mos. at this point and nothing has worked out.  Our house isn't finished.  We haven't found a new place to buy or rent.  No job.  Nada.  Just seems like at some point, you have to throw in the towel.  I don't think I'm there, yet.  I  just feel like we are stuck.  And I don't know what to do.  I feel like we've been patient.  If this doesn't work, I'm not sure what the plan would be from here.  We aren't out of options, but I am for sure out of ideas. 

No, not pity party over here.  No time for one. 

Today hasn't been super productive so far.  I have gotten the errands run, so I'm super happy about that.  Although, I forgot the Zyrtec I went to get.  BAH!  Hubby said he would stop for that.  Other than that... not much has been done.  I guess we will see.

On an irritating note, my weight is up this AM.  I checked it last night since I forgot to in the AM and it said 183.5.  That was fine.  Then this morning, 184.5.  I mysteriously gained a pound over night!  LOL  I'm not sure what it is, but it's fine.  I'm not going to dwell on it.  Now if it kept going up every day, THAT would be an issue!  Over time, though, I've realized that weight just does this.  And since I'm trying to get a base line for the month, I expect to see lots of ups and downs from daily weighing.  The good news is, I'm tracking my food and getting back into the groove of it.  Once in a while, I catch myself after popping something in my mouth and think, ugh, now I'll have to count that.  LOL  But that's good!  That means I'm catching any bad habits that have snuck in.  My cals are still a bit higher than I should be, but I am working on it.  It seems I consistently eat around 1800-1900 cals on a regular day.  Which is about what my maintenance is, so that is good.  But I need to get that down.  I have it at 1600 right now, but may go a bit lower.  Nothing drastic.  Just 1500 to give me a bit of cushion since I am down to my last 20ish-30ish pounds.  So, I am working on that.  Using my time on the bike for FB has done well, too!  Now to get in more pilates and not just my cardio.  :)  I know I won't 'build' muscle, but I'd like to tighten up what is there.  I don't think my knees or hips are going to allow much lifting.  Which sucks.  I hope to work it in starting out super light, but we will see.  Just going to do what feels good and go with it.

I guess that is it for today.  I need to enter my food, update my weight, and then... do something.  Until later.

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